Feel The Pain

There is no one
That I judge more harshly
Than myself.

For every one of my misdeeds,
I brace myself for the consequences.
No matter what they may be.

When I commit a crime,
I don’t accept it.
I can’t accept it.

Putting your mistakes behind you
Doesn’t give way to progress.

If anything,
It increases your chances
Of repeating the same mistake.

I’m harsh on myself
Because I have to be.

If the people around me
Decide they want to punish me too,
I’ll let them.

Of course being attacked by others upsets me.
But it’s not because I think they’re being unfair.
It’s because I know I brought it on myself.

Sure,
I can blame others for my mistakes.
I’ve done it before.

But that doesn’t change that it’s my fault.
If I’m wrong,
I need to live with it.

I have to feel the pain.
I have to remember how it felt
To let someone down,
So that it won’t happen again.

I want to be someone kind.
Someone who always does what’s right.
But I can’t be that person
If I never learn from my mistakes.

In order to be a better person,
You have to be critical of who you are now.

Never accept the mistakes you’ve made.
But do accept the consequences.

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